Benj-

i've not blogged in the longest time. actually i think i have alot of things that are worth blogging. and im suppose to use the new blog but i realize there are way too many memories and links here for me to just give it up. but the green is making me irritated actually. lol

i miss my friends. i miss the usuals like mad because the last time i saw them was in december. when you compare this to the life we use to have, lessons in sch, breaks, lunches and hanging out almost everyday, this pathetic no. of times we meet is really kinda sad. and now i think i understand why yz seems kinda upset by this, i realize i am too. but the only comfort i have is i have no other choice, not when i spend 5/7 days of my life in some stupid f place.

dont even get me started about the life there. i think i couldnt express myself fully even if i exhaust my vocabulary of vulgarities. lol

so i wont go there. but if i tell you i rather endure ms tan's maths lessons 6 hours a day, i think you'll understand how bad it is. HAHA

i dont even get to talk much to the usuals anymore. everyone seems to be moving on, not unexpected but still sad nonetheless. from everyday to festive seasons only, suddenly the usuals arent so usual anymore.

life goes on?

yea, i think so.

talking about the usuals, i missed the gang's outing to celebrate ade's birthday too. life really sucks when you only have 2 days of freedom. it doesnt let you do very much. no actually there's nothing you can do at all.

even finding time just to spend a few hours with friends becomes so hard.

and my life will continue on like that for another 3 months.

its getting quite hard to bear actually.

but i thank god for family and friends. well at least i get to talk to yizhen plenty and things are still plain awesome when i meet up with erika and her.

about things in camp, i think its better left unsaid. my thought about the place are a myriad of feelings, its hard to differentiate from the bearable from the unbearable.

that place is devoid of happiness.

sometimes i think, even if it dramatic, death would be a better alternative.

and i promised myself i wouldnt emo. lol. okay. booking in in 2 hours +. think thats the reason why.

cny faster come!!!