the blood pressure machine attached to me is gaowei ttm. seriously. and the funny thing is that its suppose to be taking my blood pressure every 15 mins or so but all its been doing so far is squeezing my arm real painful and showing ----- for a reading.

which means,

i probably messed around with it too much that its not working anymore.

and that means,

i probably need to wear it an entire day again. ):

it feels good to be able to slack like this. work can rly get you down. every. single. day. so im going to to seize this oppurtunity to nua into some gooey jelly thing and you have to scoop me off from where ever i last nua-ed at. LOL

1 more mth at home and i wont be seeing it anymore. im really going to miss this place. and i dont know how im gg to fit in one final house bbq here b4 heading over to yck.

):

but im looking forward to seeing the red liners there but sad that i'll be leaving erika and kenneth.

i sound like im going overseas. LOL
which sounds really good actually.
time to plan an overseas trip and find people to go with.

GOD = HEARTS ttm

i think the wisest thing to do is to never do anything in the heat of a moment. sometimes u need to type your post 2 times b4 its 'postable'. like me. hahaha~

i should spend my time doing more meaningful things instead of thinking about things that are without my control.

people always say its all about perspective. if u ask me, i think its about choice.

its not whether you see the glass as half full of half empty. but whether you are going to enjoy drinking whatever's in the glass. you can choose to put zesty lemonade in the glass or u can pee in it.

a half glass of pee isnt nice half empty or full.

and a glass of chilled sweetened lemonade is gg to taste good whether half full of half empty.

right?

i think we create our own happiness. so im gg to create some for myself and the rest for those i love to share. (:

dont you agree dear Lord?

why is it i allow you to hurt me once and time again?

but no more. it wont happen again. because i deserve better.
and even if i dont, i dont deserve to be at the mercy of you.

you make me sad and infuriated all at the same time. underappreciated and forgotten to say the least.

it is a mistake but i'll hold on for this one last time and then i'll let go.

lousy singtel, the mio line whole life cmi ttm. every now and then must shut down and go on holiday. hahaha. and i was suppose to blog like everyday and i missed my chance alr.

wa, but ive got a dozen things to blog about, okay maybe not so much but really got alot of things to talk about.

first of all, i must say i love Mr Darcy ttm. LOL. he's the best. everytime i go out i take like a hundred plus photos. i am a total camwhore. LOL. and its awesome to have people who are willing to put up with my photo taking spree.

didnt kbox with erika on friday in the end. which turns out to be a blessing in dissuise. we had damn hell alot of fun. like going to the arcade and not spending a single cent and totally using their machines to take all sort of creative shots. HAHAHAHA. damn cheapskate pls, so cheapskate until the arcade woman starting flapping around like a bat and chasing us out. HAHA! damn funny. and aft that we went to buy some damn cool anklets for the laokuis which was suppose to be 8 bucks but the gong cashier charged us only 4. wa, we totally tou xiao and dashed out the shop. we damn scared the cashier come chasing us asking for her 4 bucks. LOL! and we went to starbucks last and rmbed we had a free drink voucher from last time. used one(cause the other reserved for yizhen, loll) and sat down, camwhore smore and talked alot.

the day was sweet and sugar ttm. loved it

and met up with erika again on sun! hahaha, and we went to the expo sale that i heard about over the radio. wah it sucked. lol. the things damn old, like dinosaur old. i swear can auction to museum. LOL even the NUM there was fugly. the only redeeming quality about expo was the damn nice lighting effect it had on our photos. HAHAHAHA. anw we headed for kbox with carine aft that and had a blast all the way since then. go see fb for our horror videos.

omg, that day was more then sugar. it was diabetic.

miss my two laokuis so much.

)))):

i love God for all these good times and good friends.

omg. i wanna vomit when i read my old posts. its damn gay and damn fucked up. seriously, i nv knew i was that gross. LOL. tmr can dont go work?

did i mention, yest suju was talking to me on msn. i swear.
in my dreams la. but even in my dreams i tot i was dreaming! but i wasnt! omg. so its like reality in a dream. maybe it'll happen soon. oOOOOomg. damn exciting.
btw they only wanted to talk to me. okok, actuallyoly one of them. but good enough.

now its super junior plus.

plus me. WAHAHAHAHA

wahahaha irritating pamela, this sentence is dedicated to you. you must read it out loud. LOL! and you must do the waahaha laugh too.

oh man, im so tired. AGAIN. works sucks ttm pls. and even without the pls, it still sucks. hahahahaha. but no rly, i also dno why work got so much to do. sometimes i finish everything so quickly it seems like im almost free. ALMOST. then suddenly huge piles start coming in again. its awful.

and it doesnt help that sometimes.... urg, nvm.

my sis came back. and she bought me lots of stuff. lol. and she's back to claim back her room which i refuse to surrender because my air con havent fix yet. hahahaha~

wah nowadays i also think i quite spontaneous. but meeting up with the bitches is nice.

kbox on fri with erika~ wooooo. so exciting!

im getting fatter by the day. and dont land a spaceship on my face the next time u see it, EVEN if it looks like the moon. PLS

my connection with God weak leh now. i think must upgrade my modem. or use verybroad-band. or wire-lesser.

or maybe i should just pray more. LOL

very broadband. HAHAHAHA wire lesser. sometimes i kill myself with my own jokes. shuddup if u dont agree! HAHAHAHAHAHHAA

sometimes hor, i scared people will mistaken the things i blog about to be about them. i clarify ar, alot of things have nothing to do with friends. they are really just reflections that are based on all the bad experiences i had in my life. which are usually not things that are related to friends. okok i just thought i better made sure. lol

i rmb what i was thinking about at work that day alr. i realize that my dream has since a few years back always been to be a singer. LOL dont laugh! i seriously wna be a singer lor. and no, its not cause of the fame and the money or whatever, its really cause i love to sing and i want people to like my singing. shit this sounds more and more ridiculous the more i type it. but really. i mean i dont mind like taking part in sg idol and coming out like 4th or 3rd. thats enough for me alr. at least i know i have a little bit of potential and i'll be contented with that.

who cares if im singing at a lounge or at kbox. i dont need big stages and spotlights. i just want to sing and know that i can sing. rather than now ar, must wait for people to be out of earshot then can sing. or with family or a few friends who i know wont mind my voice.

lol. okok. this is rly more and more absurd the more i type it out.

hahahahahaha

i need to keep reminding myself life's good. and it is. so i better appreciate all these good times. cause i dont think they ever last. thank you God, family and friends for making it great.

i need to exercise. somebody pls make me exercise or exercise with me. and if u dont mind exercising with me pls dont mind my cui-ness too. lol

im so psyched about my new house. tmr i post some photos of it under construction. hahahaha

omg i am damn stupid. i actually pressed an extra slot for driving and now i have an extra lesson for me in one hours time. lol, nvm, the instructor wont know i had a lesson earlier, so im gg to act damn pro and he'll be damn impressed. HAHAHA. cheap thrill.

wah shit, i was thinking about some stuff at work today and i wanted to blog about it. but i forgot all about it, like i expected myself to. loll

yay, its the weekend and my mood is infinitely better. im so tired of work and not so hardworking bums. they whole day watch movie one leh. and im like a kuku hiding in some corner typing away like crazy. lol.

i can stop my hiatus alr i think. lol. kell totally laughed when i told her about it.

anw, its such fun reading histories of msn convos. its really like reliving those moments but sometimes it gets really awful because some of them are like gone forever. ): and i realize when u first know one another, the way u talk is quite funny. damn formal and awkward.

i wna cut hair~
i wna kbox~ 8 bucks one mind u. damn cheap. cnt take. and wah lao, my sis's room must be located in some cave under the sea in a mountain along a river and over the clouds. cause there is. no. freaking. reception. here.

S:

driving (AGAIN) in an hour. LOL. seriously damn stupid la

eee. internet connection in my sister's room sucks. and the already lagging like mad fb is impossible to open here. i know i know, hiatus from social networking but im trying to upload photos la cause yesterday keep failing.

anw i think humans are such funny creatures. lol, they are always finding excuses and justifications to make themselves feel better. even when they know that there's actually smth wrong with them. hahaha, of course, being human, i think im guilty of the same thing. but i think it would be a lot more noble and a lot more cool if people spent more time admitting their mistakes rather than trying to cover them up.

if its me, i would rather spend the time reflecting about what i do wrong rather than pretending im not. because no one is going to blame you for making an effort to change. but people are going to get mad plenty if you know that youre doing smth wrong and yet trying to push your luck, insisting you're right.

okok, i spent two paragraphs saying the same thing i think. lolll.

i dont like myself enough to trust myself to talk to people properly yet. and its quite hilarious cause i need to tou tou go online and ask kell to send me ahsa's new songs. LOL. and i didnt get kellie, i got her evil twin liekel instead. funny things happen everyday. like this quote i saw at my workplace "oh god pls give me faith and hope to persevere in my work, but pls dont give me strength cause i will hammer the person who's doing this to me" LOL. i also dno why police got so many this kinda thing. either they very free or they very bored. LOL

i on the other hand find myself feeling sick to the core clearing other people's backlog. and they really didnt bother to do anything right. if i wasnt on a quest to be more understanding towards ppl i would call them all things mean and nasty. LOL.

yay, tmr is friday alr.

and b1, i know u read this and in case i forget to sms u, next week go kbox the 7-10 slot at safra. but im afraid u wont want cause its at boon lay which is very very far for you. anw u let me know ok? erika say she any day also can. and i mon, tues, wed, fri all can. so u decide! (((:

oh dear God. i feel damn bad cause i nv pray for a damn long time. i say hiatus with you but i keep living in my own world. LOL. sorrysorry, pls remind me to pray ok. lol, okok, i'll remind myself. hahahaha

i tell myself i must live each day like my last or at least try to. cause this way i wont regret anything.

i dont think 12 am should count as a start of a new day. lol, it feels so weird to refer to smth that happened less than 2 hours ago as yesterday.

but for blogging purposes, alright, yesterday, lol, i met up with most of the Gang for a impromptu kbox session. okay, wait, give me a moment to advertise for kbox at safra. ITS DAMN DARN COOL! i swear. you know, the controls are on this huge touch screen thing that looks like a ultra oversized ipad. no freaky eye things like other branches. loll. and its rly 8 bucks for a session from 7-10. which is really really very cheap.

hahaha. ok enough ads. had a lovely time camwhoring with them. took alot, and i mean alot of ugly fat photos of myself that seriously cmi. lol. remind me nv to wear a cardigan and take photos again. hahahaha.

anw, it was a short but great time. tho i think i'd prefer kboxing with b1 or the laokuis cause we have more similar song taste. lol. but it was a grean enjoyment nonetheless. camwhoring is equally fun! whoohoo~

im starting to really dislike work because i realize i finish my work very quickly. and so other people start pushing their own workload onto me. well its okay to help but the thing is i finish those quickly too, so in the end, they push everything to me while they sit around and enjoy life.

well i am feeling mad and injustly treated but i came across this quote thing in the office. (it seems to be the hobby of my supervisor, lol, sticking these random quotes everywhere) anw i loved this quote. it says: expect less from man but more from God.

it means alot of things to me. and one of them is to be alot more accepting towards others instead of wanting ppl to please u all the time. they dont have to you know. because i dont do it all the time.

i think this helps with alot of anger and upsetting issues. (:

see, i told you God was everywhere. even in the office. LOLLLLL

nowadays the blogskins are so ugly. some of them just look really freaky, while others are just frightening. all the nice ones are girl ones, which goes to show girls have better aesthetic sense. lol

but i manage to come up with a pretty nice blogskin (if i may say so myself). lol. i told myself no fb and no msn. and i mean it man. so i whiled the time away revamping my blog which was horrendously ugly. hahahaha. and im so pleased with the result. woohoo.

but i decided to do away with a large part of links. other peoples' blogs which ive never visited. lol. its funny how we use to think that having alot of links means we're popular. i dont wna be popular. i rather have a close, heartwarming grp of friends i can count on. i read this note chenting gave me a long time ago, but it rly got me thinking. "i rather be ugly, because it means people like me for who i am and not for my looks" hahahaha deepness aside, its one of the rare moments chenting actually comes up with smth so meaningful and woah. instead of her usual "aguabahjuboola" and all other funny sounds. HAHA

but anyway, this forced quiet time rly helps. i found out that ive lost a large part of what i use to be. so its time to find it back. (:

anw. MY AIRCON is spoilt. its horrible~ imagine waking up feeling like a oven toasted turkey. (note to self, say sorry next time i eat turkey) so now i have to move to my sister's room instead. luckily she's overseas or i'll be stuck in the guest room with a ridiculously huge bed and nearly no walking space. haha! my sister's room takes some getting use to. first because its so huge and second cause its so filled with girl stuff. like stuffed toys and pink files and bags. lucky no lingerie. LOL!

i miss my room but its nice having a change of environment. like how i need change too. i need to stop being horrible.

):

GODGODGOD~ ure the only one i can depend on now.

meeting the Gang tmr. and if im not dead by then, KBOX. woohoo~

600th post! and plus a few more actually. but this is the official 600th one. quite impressive right. hahahaha

anw, cannot. i realize i need to get an overhaul. both inside and outside. im disliking myself more and more. i find myself so detestable sometimes (well not just because im fat and fugly) but also because im becoming so... wah, whats that word. apathetic? no, no, its more like... all i care is about myself. but egocentric doesnt seem like the right word. aiya. whatever it is. i just suck.

yes, i dont like myself now seriously.

ok, i resolve to not talk to anyone until i undergo a META-MORPHOSIS. LOL

nono, im serious. no more msn, no more fb, no more outings. until i get myself right. im gg to be a caveman. ugga ugga woo woo.

what a stupid waste of time typing this, when i can be spending time reflecting.
lolll

600th post and so such a shitty one.

GOD!!! lets go for a hiatus. i need to connect myself with you again.

btw, my camera is ultimate love. it better be cause it cost a bomb.

its funny. because we all wna think that we're right. and when someone comes along to challenge that we get all defensive and offended.

am i a bad christian?

i think i am. because God is so good to me. because when im down in the dumps he's always there to make it better again. because he makes my life more awesome than it should be.

and yet i cant even be bothered to put in one day a week to do smth he likes. i think im the worse kind of christian ever.

and it took a non christian to tell me that. (and no uberbitch im not mad at you. im just rly affected by what u said, so i nded to blog it to reflect. LOL)

i guess i rly am sucky. but im not gg to push myself down so far. as far as im concerned whether ima sucky christian or not, i am gg to love him just as much. because if it comes down to it, i will always and always, choose him.

WHOOO~

whoo because its the weekend! and thats awesome cause it means no work!!!! yes im serious, it is THAT bad. BUT WHOO also because i finally cleared all the backlog! IN THREE DAYS MIND YOU.

hahahaha i amaze myself with the amt of effort i put in and i was telling bitchtwo that if i put in the same amount of work for sch i would have done really well.

*&!&@*!*!@%!

oh well, too late.

and seriously some people dno how to punch hole one leh. got so difficult not. either they cock eye or lazy. worst, lazy cock eye. *!&!%!&~ i should come up with a system that everytime someone doesnt punch straight holes they have to punch their own eye.

and if that happens, singapore will have its own personal Panda Zoo.

with the exception of me. cause i punch very straight holes. SO THERE

GODGODGODGODGOD LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE
even if the past two days didnt seem to go right, i still love you ubermuch

H E L P

and i am merely making a statement

that i would be the best kind of worker anyone can hire. firstly because its cheap labour, earning only 2.50 an hour. secondly because i can clear 1 mths worth of backlog in less than 3 days. thirdly because i do it willingly and conscientiously.

dont you think im simply the best worker.

no no seriously im not praising myself. in fact i dont even feel a sense of satisfaction aft doing all that. i feel entirely used and utterly cheated. because only a fool will work so hard or nth.

i am really really exhausted. this morning, when i saw the two boxes worth of paper i needed to sort and organize i seriously nearly cried. the workload is so overwhelming and im pushing myself to finish everything in the shortest time possible. 8 hours of work non stop is really no joke.

but really, who would be so irresponsible to leave behind 1 mth worth of backlog for the one taking over to clear. ITS NOT FAIR. it really isnt. and now im struggling so hard to try and clear it before my current assignments pile up.

AND DID I MENTION IM ONLY A TEMP!

im rly so tired now. an having driving lessons in the night is no joke either. having half an hour each to wolf down dinner and lunch just to rush around for work and lessons is in every sense of the word, horrible.

so H E L P

i cant wait for the weekend to come. cycling with uberbitch will probably make thgs better

i am exhausted. and i think about tmr's workload and i wna cry again.

wah life as a crime clerk is busy ttm. i think if i were stuck that for the rest of my ns life i would end up being uber tired. and i'll probably shrivel up like some dried old salted veggie. and i have no idea why i use that particular weird imagery.

im think cause im really ultra tired.

and then tmr is gg to be another long day. PLUS i have driving in the night.

AHHHHHH~

GOD!!!!!

i feel so full. actually bloated would be a better word. and i actually just woke up from a nap. LOL. who ever heard of a nap at night? but at least im not like bitch1 who woke up at 5?

work hasnt actually started yet. the commander decided he has to think twice b4 he gets a secretary who cant shoot nor run. so excuse me while i find the nearest file to shoot and the telephone to run from. &*@^!*$@*!

its ok, i wouldnt mind ordinary office work too.

i feel God's presence more and more everyday. and i feel so very lucky. better than winning the toto.

driving in half an hour! vrooom~

more funny msn convos

❤ yizhen says:
*and then i can take ur toto money go buy a bmw
❤ yizhen says:
*WIN WIN SITUATION
Benj# <3 God says:
*you wish
❤ yizhen says:
*we both get what we want!!!
Benj# <3 God says:
*if i win toto
Benj# <3 God says:
*all u get is a dog biscuit
❤ yizhen says:
*okay
❤ yizhen says:
*that totally called for a middle finger


and that day when lichu was talking

kellie: eh you applying for rws right
chu: eh ya yizhen you help me apply alr not
yizhen: huh apply what,sunblock ar?

Don't lose your way
With each passing day
You've come so far
Don't throw it away
Live believing
Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith, hope & glory
Hold to the truth in your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the wind
Must learn how to bend
Seek out a star
Hold on to the end
Valley, mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears all away
Words are swaying
Someone is praying
Please let us come home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are out there in the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark we'll feel the light
Warm our hearts, everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
As high as souls can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I

there are many things to cherish in this world.

and family i definitely at the top of it all.



but then comes friends.

friends like these


my largest favourite bestest grp of friends


the people who made life with tbk bearable


the two girls who tell me plenty


the 3 i cherish most. who always make me laugh so much my stomach aches


being with these 2 is so natural its like breathing


EIGHT YEARS of friendship and going strong. not to mention the craziest funnest ppl i love oh so much


(: the one and only best friend. tho i dont say this much but thank you veryveryvery much.


for a funny goofy not so gd lking fat guy, i sure have incredible friends. i wna thank you all so much and

I LOVE YOU GOD!!!!!

today was a super tiring day. woke up at 7+ and went for driving and had to chiong around aft that to cook, get ready, dress up, go out.

but it was worth it. well at least in some ways it was. like the really awesome and fun picnic the gang had. and thanks guys for liking my fried rice. oh man, we're a just a super loveable, camwhoring bunch. love them ttm.

and today was like fashion disaster day or smth. very long nv have such a day alr man but super sian and sucky.

anw, HAPPY 19TH kenneth! im sorry your cel turned out like shit and you had to see your own candles poked into the cake b4 your very eyes. damn horrifying. and then the place just turned out so sucky. URGH. no more timbre for me. from now on, TGIF.

but i gotta say, the usuals are as usual a real wonderful bunch. they are just another group of friends who make my life uber great. and im so glad i made some of the best friends from amongst them.

<3

aiya i just love God the most for giving me all these. what would i do without him, i rly dno. if i could give him a big hug i would man. LOL

REALLYREALLYTHELASTWEEKATHTA. lol. so the course (however lame and unnecessary) past in a blink of an eye. time flies and come monday i'll be an official underpaid clerk. emphasis on the UNDER-PAID. lol. but its ok. ive had it good.

BTW STUPID KAPLAN HASNT GOTTEN BACK TO ME. some private u huh.

i had my 2nd driving lesson today and the instructor was in every sense of the word emotionless. and i shall call him mr monotone. i much rather have yest's one. even if he was abit cheena, at least he praise me hor. AND SAT maybe go on the road alr. and i regret taking manual now cause its so much harder. BUT it'll pay off just like everything else. ((((:

know why, cause God has planned a b-e-a-u-tiful life for me. WOOHOO!

i thank God especially for my friends who are always making me laugh. and if i were defined by my friends, i think i would be quite an awesome person. HAHAHA.

I WANT MORE GOD IN MY LIFE PLS!!!! and i macham small child craving attention but who tires of God anw. and he's my best best best Father anytime anywhere.

(((((:

meet up with choo and B1 tmr! oh man, exciting.

im super paranoid now. i keep looking over my back every 3 secs.

those sarawakians are sick. they slash and mutilate ppl for stupid things like ez link cards and 43 bucks?? wtf. i hope they recieve their due. and i hope my dearest Father will bless and care for those who suffered unduly.

OMG, what if they see this. AND THEY DECIDE TO ATTACK ME.

die.

seriously dearest friends. WATCH OUT AND BE CAREFUL. plsplsplspls.

as usual, i have the funniest msn conversations. LOL

Li Chu says:
*i never heard before
Li Chu says:
*only heard of ham before
Benj# <3 God says:
*hahaha means you seldom go grovery shopping
Benj# <3 God says:
*unlike me
Benj# <3 God says:
*the auntieking
Benj# <3 God says:
*whole life go supermarket one
Benj# <3 God says:
*HAHAHA
Li Chu says:
*grovery shopping
Li Chu says:
*hmmmm
Li Chu says:
*whats that i wonder
Benj# <3 God says:
*its a more groovy way of grocery shopping. wah lao, u got so cavewoman or not
Li Chu says:
*HAHAHAHHAHAHA
Li Chu says:
*you damn nonsense omg!
Benj# <3 God says:
*HAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHA! you should see the things i do on FB to annoy ahchoo~ its hilariously funny! ah gotta love my dear ahchoo's reactions. LOLLL. i still rmb all her funny faces she use to give. and how i would always imitate them. omg u rmb!! wah serious nostalgia.

anw, driving lesson in like 1hr plus! omg, &!%#&@%!& super exciting. maybe God will be kind and i'll be such a prodigy at driving that i only need 5 lessons to take exam. WOOHOO. totally love you God. and even if u dont. i love you anw. HAHA

know why, cause i cant imagine life without you. oh-my-God.

meet up this fri and sat!! OOOOooOOOoo

starting driving lessons on wed! damn cool.

oh no, its not like today today alr. its the 1st of june. haha, happy belated bday dad then. not like u'll see this anw.

cant wait to drive. vroooom~

hahahahaha

GOD IS GREAT!!