Benj-

oh man.. its been such a long time since i last blogged!! i think its partly bcoz of prelims.. as i had to study when ppl were taking a break.. sobs.. and partly becoz i FELL SICK AGAIN!!!! it totalli sux man.. and quess wad?? its exactly de same problem!! its a bludy throat inflammation again!!!!!!!!!!! even swallowing saliva is painful and so is drinking water! why does this keep happening to me?? its so unbearably painful!!! oh man.. i wanna recover soon.. i hate being sick during the hols.. it totalli sux big time lah.

i had geog and amaths xam on mondae. i gues amath was ok.. i cud do quite alot of questions.. though i was still unable to complete the entire ppr.. i hope can get at least b3 or 4.. its alr a marked improvement lahs... and den i had geog.. i had to thank sum ppl, so i knew it was coniferous and not deciduous.. lols.. im cheatin lors.. and guess wad.. i cudnt finish geog!!! omg lahs.. i think i wrote alot this time.. sobs.. so no time to finish de rez.. feel lyk crying.. if i dun get at least a b3, ms ridz will be disappointed.. wah dat sux lahs.. ive come to realise dat ms ridz is actualli realli ok.. esp outside of cls.. hahas.. i guez my perception of her chnge 180 degrees when she was so nice about writing my testimonial.. it was damn nice of her.. although i hvn got it yet.. lols.. but thx alot niwaes. she wasnt angry abt me missin geog too.. she was teriibly nice about it.. hahas.. so was mrs leong.. she was mor concernd bout me doing well den takin de ppr asap.. which is sooo nice of her.. =) thankew!!!

i dunno wad to sae about my life now.. i onli noe dat im becomin mor and mor unbearable to my parents.. dat night my mum scolded me.. which i highly suspect was due to probs at work and she was takin it out on my sis and me.. which made me feel damned pissed.. this is so wrong lah.. when she scolded me, i actualli retorted bck in a veri cold and sarcastic tone.. when she scolded me, i looked at sumwhere else as if i didnt care.. well firz it was because she was desperately cooking up reasons to scold me.. i mean lyk " i dun want to have to awaez pick up ur shoes, wad u think i am? ur maid?" dis is so obvious dat its juz her taking her frustration out on me lahs.. and she blames me when my tuition teacher doesnt come.. HELLO? do i luk lyk my tuition teacher?? so yah.. i was damned pissed when she scolded me, so i was rly rude to her as well.. but i guess i shudnt do dat.. i realli shudnt.. ooo i hate when i do things out of anger.. sry mum.

i noticed this world realli revolves arnd money.. everything is about money lahs.. i hate it.. since when can love be shown thru money, since when is love measured by how much money is spent.. which my mum nevers fails to remind me how much shes payin for my tuition fees. drats.. im badmouthing ppl again.. but its kinda lyk an awful truth... and its reality.. but its not me i guess.. money.. is... crappy... (budden, why dun i lyk spendin money then? kinda dumb lahs)

i think i have a acute annual delayed musical response syndrome(AADMRS).. hahas.. i lyk old contemporary singers lors.. which is wierd, coz they arent old time singers, but niether are they up and in.. nor hip and happenin... im refering to marion raven.. lols.. ive fell in love with end of me!!.. the vocals are so cool!!! esp when u hit the right note and drag it!!!! omg its super nice.. heres and eg " this is the LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaST of illusIONs" wah nice man.. did i mention de acoustics..? woah.. super cool i luv it!!!!!! hahas.. when she was in m2m, she sang realli well too.. hahas... im so suffering from AADMRS

i miss SINGAPORE IDOL!!!!!!!! i wanna CRY!!!!!! nvm todae got result show.. i had tuition mahs.. den after dat i was feeling damn ill.. so i just sit on de study room chair and stone... lols.. how i wished i stoned in front of the tv instead... sobs.. nvm.. must watch on saturdae.. =)

my lord, i dun undst why u inflict me with de exact same pain as b4, and made it worst... it realli hurts alot.. everytime i swallow smth, its lyk swallowing a knife.. and no matter how much i pray, u wudnt take de pain away.. although u did lemme slp wifout wakin and realisin de pain.. but when im awake.. it hurts lyk hell.. i pray my lord u wud allow me to recover soon... i stil love u =))

i dled a rather basic graphic design prog called wizardbrush.. but its nth compared to adobe photoshop cs2 which is lyk super duper ex lahs... i wonder how come my sun nu and clara hv.. its lyk sooo ex.. i also want lehs... aiya but compared to paint... wizardbrush is much much more sophisticated... hahas.. de pics turn out ok too.. the effects are ok... quite nice lahs..

kaes.. think i shud stop bloggin alr.. hahas... i wanna go slack now.. wif this bludy throat i dunno how im gonna study lahs... damn suay lors.. anibdy noe of good remedie for curing and relieving de pain?? if have plz leave sum behind lehs.. shall be eternalli grateful

clara said i was lyk shunda.. i surmise its not anithing good... well i dunno, i gues sumtimes i dunno where to draw the line b/w jokes and being serious.. although i have to admit im gettin mor and mor uncontrollable... i guess i shud apologise.. well sorri clara... if i pissed u off in ani way
but i realli dunno wad it take to please everybody lahs.. i try to shift into different forms of myself to suit each individual, and honestly.. its quite tiring.. sumtimes i even forget to change my form, den make ppl unhappi, well i noe nbdy ask me to do it and its my own fault.. but sumtimes i wonder, if anione actualli gives a damn how i feel. when i feel angry, ppl sae im being unreasonable, when im sad, ppl sae im being problematic, when im too happi, ppl sae im too nonchalant. i guess i hv nbdy to blame.. i brought this all upon myself, and if i were give the same choices, i wud still choose de same thing.. oh wells, we live wif our choices, we do wad we can.. im not gg to regret.. if dis path was meant for a wierdo i'll be de wierdo den

loves!!! [aollovin]