Benj-

i admire people who are able to remain unchanged in that raging sea of.. erm, difficult company.

no, it's not that i don't know that there are mads, bengs, lians and minahs around. i just pretend they never existed. i can't imagine associating myself with them, i guess, in some ways, i do seem kind of snobbish and full of airs since i refuse to acknowledge their very existence.

it isn't that i'm a better person or better human, it's just people from outside my world function in such strange and queer mannerisms. and they indulge in acts that just doesn't make any sense to me.

maybe i'm the one that's wierd.

or it could be the fact that i have remained relatively sheltered and pampered throughout all my years. and it appears that my view is so narrowly limited and that i refuse to accept the fact that the world spins in directions more than one.

but i simply don't dig that foul cigarette, that revolting alcohol, that wanton lust, that all too colourful language, that unending greed and the forgotten conscience.

but many do. so maybe i am wierd.

anyway, orchard today. missed gym. but it was okay, because i enjoyed it very much too.

i'm sorry.

clara sent me an extremely meaningful email. thanks clara! but it simplifies things to such a stage, it reminds me of myself when i was younger. and that's saying alot.

lol.

few more days to korea. i'll miss ya guys.

i'll miss celebrating cny with all of you.

i'll miss wed, harry potter day.

i'll miss so many things.

and i keep thinking what if my plane crashes?
and what if i never return?

i mean accidents happen.

what if next mon and tues are my last days.

i think the thought of that is in every aspect of the word, frightening.

hahahaha

somehow humour doesn't make it seem any less scary.

oh, and woe betide the person who made the coke, pork video.

hahahhaha