Benj-

i know now very well what sort of person i am. im the sort of person who craves approval from people. that sounds kinda desperate and pathetic doesnt it? it makes me feel like i have no mind of my own and im so un-independant. lol dependant just doesnt sounds right.

but thats just the way i am, i think. i think a large part comes from having very low self esteem. i just dont feel good enough about myself to ascertain my own place in this world. problematic? very. but im glad i have a few very good friends who will bother. yet its this that makes me feel insecure.

so i guess thats what i all comes down to right. insecurity. which apparently isnt only an issue in relationships but in friendships as well. which im quite sick of because i realize alot of things i mull over are actually quite non existent at all.

like i said, its just about how much u enjoy being with them. as long as u can enjoy one anothers company, thats all that matters. friends wont always be thr when u need them, lets be real, who is? in the end all we want is someone to satisfy our own needs right?

selfish bastards we are. LOL but who isnt.

but there are people who try. so these people are those we keep. those we trust, we love, we like, we prefer and sometimes get annoyed at(keep it real la. lol).
do i have these friends? not many but enough to keep me gg and enough for me to want to try and be there for them as well.

i typed this drawing inspiration from yz's post. lol.

anw, no work today, mood increased to maximum. awesomest.

note to self: forget the nitty grities. just enjoy life